Managing expectations…and fears

The results are in. You now know. What next?

I don’t know about you but this is the usual mental checklist post any test related activity. In academia, as a student, this is an innumerable occurrence. This scenario can also be applied to real life situations such as:

  • following a visit to the doctor’s office and also upon the return of  lab results,
  • at the garage when your motor vehicle is placed on the computer diagnostic machine,
  • when you are at the store after binge shopping and the clerk just swiped your credit or debit card and,
  • definitely after you have cast your ballot and you await the final counts.

Some instances are more nerve-wracking than others but nevertheless a commonality is anxiety. Nordqvist (2016) writing for Medicalnewstoday states that ‘anxiety affects a person’s whole being. It affects how we think and how we feel, and it has physical symptoms too. Anxiety resembles fear but when a person experiences fear, they know what we are afraid of. Anxiety is often less specific.’ I can relate. We all can relate. Meaning that we have had anxious moments in our lives.  It would seem that with all the environmental stressors of anxiety that it is quite necessary that we determine ways to mitigate against anxiety. I find that we need to develop ways to manage expectations as a way to accomplishing this.

Expectation (noun) is, according to the Oxford dictionary, a strong belief that something will happen or be the case. In addition to simply having a preference for the Oxford’s definition of English words I realize that this definition is often true of what we do when we have expectations. If we are to really understand, using this definition, what happens when we EXPECT we would realize that inextricably linked to this is a faith based belief system in action… if not then we need to really evaluate what we are doing as we live out our existence. Quite frankly we should not carry-on  zombie-like and comatose lives when we are breathing living beings. Introspecting on just HOW we exist must become a priority ‘spring cleaning’ action.We should take stock of not only WHAT we do but HOW we do and WHY we do the things we do. Go right back to the basics …even with the processing of our thoughts.

In so doing we will consciously be aware of what we desire and the implications, in the event that we do or NOT get what we desire, such that we will be prepared to have a healthy reaction. Back to the definition… if one holds a strong belief then commensurately one should have evidence to the high probability of said belief being fulfilled and /or manifested. The absence of tangible and scientifically proven ways of achieving the thing or outcome (object or subject of one’s desire) may make one seem … well frankly a fool…. yet if one intrinsically trust and value other ways of doing and other means of achieving then that individual frees his/herself from synthetic systems fed to mainstream society, meant to lock society into expecting particular outcomes. It is when people do not see or have the results expected – due to the society led belief systems- that there is anxiety and panic.

Thus expectation cannot be void of faith.

However misplaced faith is a pitfall to avoid at all cost. In selecting a candidate to represent you for example, as it pertains the governance of your community, country and dare I say the free world, an assessment of the person and their position on the core principles you stand for is not an exercise in futility. When you are confident in the candidate’s ability and when you are clear on what they value then you can only exercise your franchise and hope that the majority of the eligible voters do the same. Now this is within the context that the electoral process operates in the manner where it is the majority of the ‘peoples’ vote that counts. If this is the anomaly then you will expect that your candidate who will be a part of government will fight on and eke out meaning victories in the foreseeable future where it will really matter. There is no luxury afforded to wallow in disappointment and victim like sorrow. In fact it is a charge to be more resolute, to work smarter and fight harder.

Each individual must resoundingly amplify the faith that will herald the expected outcome, if not today but in the time allotted. Eventually there will be a collective and holistic realism to existence on earth.

 

Out of sorts…it seems like right is wrong and wrong is right but D.I.A.L

‘…so much trouble in the world…’ Bob Marley

Its been a while since I have had the strength yes strength to write a post notwithstanding (a) a lot having transpired over the past months and (b) I have so much on my troubled mind. But let me summarily get to a few of them. The shooting in the head of the young school girl last month shook me to the core. I remember this little girl, who was a Primary classmate and schoolmate of my son, running around in class and the number of occasions I had to interact with her. The fact that here it was an innocent young girl was on her way to school, in the early morning of a normal school day…enough said on that. I, like so many others are so happy and thankful, believing in God to carry her through.

Words from one of the most recent prolific reggae artist Nesbeth’s  latest song entitled DIAL (devil is a liar) is like solace to my soul lately.